Why Am I a People Pleaser?

Why Am I a People Pleaser? 

Are you addicted to be nice all the time? It is an addiction! And it will deplete you of your energy and time.

An addiction is defined as… “not having control over doing, taking or using something to the point where it could be harmful to you.”

If you can’t stop being so nice, doing everything for everyone, at the cost of your own happiness, then you likely have an addiction to being nice. While “being too nice” isn’t formally recognized as an addiction like substance abuse, it can certainly become a behavioral pattern or a coping mechanism that negatively impacts an individual’s well-being. 

People who consistently prioritize others’ needs over their own, often to the detriment of their own health and happiness, may exhibit traits associated with people-pleasing or codependency.

While being kind and considerate is generally a positive trait, when taken to extremes, it can have detrimental effects on one’s mental, emotional, and physical health. Like any behavioral pattern, it’s important for individuals to recognize when their tendency to be excessively nice is causing harm and to seek support in establishing healthier boundaries and self-care practices.

What you’re really addicted to is getting that response of approval, validation, being liked, feeling loved, and feeling included.

The next time you find yourself…

* Saying ‘Yes’ when really, you just want to say ‘No’,

* Or agreeing with someone, when in reality, you couldn’t disagree more,

* Or maybe letting your friend pick the restaurant when really, would rather go somewhere else, 

Then take notice, and later when you have some privacy, replay that situation and imagine…

* Saying “No”

* Or saying, …. “Actually I completely disagree with you!”

* Or saying, …. “I would like to pick the restaurant this time!”

Really sit that scenario and lean into what feelings come up. What is it that you’re afraid of?

I’d love to hear what comes up for you.

If you struggle with always being that “nice girl”, I put together a free training, “The Nice Girl’s Guide to Saying NO”. Drop me a comment below and I’ll reply with a direct link.

I’m Donna, a Wellness Coach… I broke free from living a life of accommodating everyone else’s needs… to living a life on my own terms, every single day. 

It then became my mission to help as many women as possible who are suffering from chronic people-pleasing and inability to set firm healthy boundaries.

#WhyAmIaPeoplePleaser