Poor Emotional Boundaries Includes Saying ‘No’ Then Worrying

Poor emotional boundaries includes saying ‘No’ then worrying about it. That is not a healthy boundary.

You might set a boundary, but if you’re living with worry and guilt about it the rest of the day or the week or the month, then that is not a healthy boundary.

When someone says “No” to a request or situation but then worries about it afterward, it often indicates a conflict between their initial decision and their subsequent thoughts or feelings. This conflict can stem from various factors:

Fear of Rejection or Disappointment: The person may worry about disappointing others or fear negative consequences for asserting their boundaries. They might be concerned about how their refusal will be perceived or whether it will strain their relationships.

Guilt or Obligation: Even when they know saying “no” is the right choice for them, they may still feel guilty for not meeting others’ expectations or fulfilling perceived obligations. This guilt can lead to rumination and second-guessing of their decision.

Desire for Approval: The person may have a strong need for approval or fear being seen as selfish. They might worry about how their refusal will affect their image or how others perceive them.

Anxiety about Conflict: Saying “no” can sometimes lead to conflict or confrontation, which can be uncomfortable for some individuals. They may worry about potential conflict or backlash from their decision, leading to anxiety or stress.

Self-Doubt: The person might doubt their own judgment or decision-making abilities, especially if they’re used to prioritizing others’ needs over their own. They may question whether they made the right choice or if they could have handled the situation differently.

In essence, worrying after saying “no” could indicate underlying issues related to assertiveness, self-esteem, or fear of negative outcomes. It’s essential for individuals in this situation to practice self-compassion, remind themselves of their reasons for saying “no,” and explore ways to manage their worries and build confidence in their decisions.

There are 9 strong indicators you have poor emotional boundaries.  If you want this list that I use with my coaching clients, drop me a comment below and I’ll DM you a direct link.

I’m Donna, a Wellness Coach… 

I broke free from living a life of accommodating everyone else’s needs…

to living a life on my own terms, every single day. It then became my mission to help as many women as possible to find self love, live life on their own terms and still be loving and giving to others.

#PoorEmotionalBoundaries